And the winner is...

Pete Hisey contributes a year-end award:

"And the Clueless Fascist Moron of the Year Award Goes to..."




Before I announce the winner, I just want to say that the competition this year was fierce. Every nominee, from Trent Lott to Don Rumsfeld to George Bush...what can I say, they were SPECTACULAR. Let's have a big hand for them.

OK, OK, I know you all want to know who won...could someone help Mr. Kissinger back to his table, please. Hank, we love ya, but you didn't quite make it this year. I know you'll be back.

Now remember, this award is not for the most dangerous fascist moron, which I am sure you will win handily, Mr. Ashcroft. Take a bow. It is for the single most clueless, moronic, idiotic, fascist jerkoff of the year. Someone who, as the kids say these days, just doesn't get it.

Well, the winner this year went way over the top, and we are just...humbled. He has formed a nonprofit agency to produce television shows to be broadcast throughout the Muslim world. And the first show they're working on? A new version of that classic on-the-road adventure Route 66, this time starring two hip young Arabic men, tooling around America and having adventures along the way. We personally think that each show should open with a close up of the grafitti in whatever small-town holding cell they've found themselves in this week, but maybe we just don't understand high art!

Give it up for former Reagan adviser and ambassador, Richard Fairbanks!