An Evil Plot By Supervillains

This really is something out of Pinky and the Brain. It appears that Bush and his dastardly minions are plotting to explode the brains of much of the country during the inaugural:

The inaugural ceremony will include performances by the U.S. Naval Academy Glee Club, the U.S. Marine Band and mezzo sopranos Denyce Graves and Susan Graham.

Guy Hovis, a vocalist from Tupelo, Miss., who performed on the Lawrence Welk show, will sing, “Let the Eagles Soar,” a song written by Attorney General John Ashcroft.

Everybody, get to your soundproof safe rooms. It's the only way to survive.