Wednesday, October 16, 2024

A Novel Approach To Covering Donald Trump In The Newspaper

Philip Bump tries what he says instead of continuing to cover "Donald Trump," a largely fictional creation of our finest newspaper.
“Like my fellow Americans,” the woman said, “my grocery bill has not gone down. Everything is still so very expensive. What steps will your administration take to help American families suffering from this inflation?”

What follows is Trump’s response in its entirety. Some audience feedback is indicated, and we’ve added some footnotes for clarification and correction. Paragraph breaks are placed approximately where Trump appeared to shift his train of thought. Trump’s answer

“So, you know, it’s such a great question in the sense that people don’t think of grocery. You know, it sounds like not such an important word when you talk about homes and everything else, right? But more people tell me about grocery bills, where the price of bacon, the price of lettuce, the price of tomatoes, they tell me. [1] And we’re going to do a lot of things.

“You know, our farmers aren’t being treated properly. And we had a deal with China, and it was a great deal — I never mentioned it because once covid came in, I said, that was a bridge too far because I had a great relationship with President Xi [Jinping]. And he’s a fierce man and he’s a man that likes China and I understand that. But we had a deal and he was perfect on that deal, $50 billion he was going to buy. [2] We were doing numbers like you wouldn’t believe, for the farmer. But the farmers are very badly hurt. The farmers in this country, we’re going to get them straightened out. We’re going to get your prices down.
It continues at the link.

Still as our wise New York Times journalist has informed us (below), it doesn't matter how they do their jobs, so just play your Wordle and shut the fuck up.